Paulist Fr. Rich Andre preached this homily for a reconciliation service at St. Austin Catholic Parish in Austin, TX on December 14, 2020. The following readings were proclaimed at the service: 1 Kings 19:1-13a and Psalm 138.

In a time of few social gatherings, it can still be curiously difficult to enter into the quiet. In a time of social distancing, we seek the refuge of God’s loving embrace. Tonight, we enter the quiet and the embrace, and we will listen to God’s message of love in scripture and sacrament. We will recall the times we’ve failed to live in harmony with that love, and in trembling or in confidence, we will receive God’s forgiveness, strengthened for the next leg of our journeys as disciples.

In our reading tonight, we will hear an extended section of the story of Elijah, portions that we don’t usually hear all together in one Mass. After winning a stunning victory over the priests of the pagan god Baal, Elijah kills the priests. Now Queen Jezebel wants to kill Elijah. As he flees the country, Elijah has apparently given up on himself. But God hasn’t given up on Elijah. 

No matter what sins we have committed, God has not given up on us, either. Let us pray:

God of the unexpected,
calm our hearts and minds.
Remove the things that hinder us from receiving Christ.
In the cacophony of noise, 
     help us to hear your voice and to heed your instructions.
In our world of information overload, 
     help us to see joy and to point it out to others.
May we become ever more like Christ 
     as we prepare to live with you and the Holy Spirit, 
     one God for ever and ever. Amen. 

In the ancient kingdom of Israel, no king was as evil as King Ahab. According to the Bible, Ahab’s greatest sin was marrying Jezebel, a princess who worshipped the pagan god Baal. Because of Jezebel’s influence, Ahab led the Israelites in turning from the one true God to the worship of Baal instead.

It is at this point that God calls Elijah to his prophetic ministry. Elijah eventually challenges Jezebel’s priests to a “whose god is the greatest?” contest in front of all the people of Israel. Elijah wins in extravagant fashion and immediately orders the slaughter of the 450 priests of Baal. When Jezebel retaliates by threatening to kill him, Elijah flees the country. He cries out to God, “Take my life, for I am no better than my ancestors.” 

At first glance, it seems as if God makes Elijah jump through a lot of hoops before responding to Elijah’s plea. But if we look at the story again, that’s not the case at all. Almost immediately after Elijah calls out, God sends an angel. Shortly after, God sends another angel. After Elijah makes his 40-day trek from the northern part of the kingdom of Israel to the southernmost part of the kingdom of Judah, God speaks to Elijah again. While Elijah frames it in his mind that he is going to great lengths to seek God, it seems as if God is going to great lengths to get Elijah’s attention, chasing after him. Elijah is still too caught up in his own world to listen to what God has to say. It’s only after a terrifying windstorm, an earthquake, and a fire that Elijah approaches the front of the cave in humility.

And maybe that’s the case for a lot of us. This year has jolted most of us out of our normal routines. The “what else can go wrong in 2020?” jokes wore thin a long time ago: we’ve faced plague, lockdown, disruption of our entire educational system, economic devastation, serious questions about racial and economic inequality, wildfires, hurricanes, and a seemingly-endless legal battle over a presidential election. And now, we stand at the precipice of our nation’s worst housing crisis in 80 years and the highest daily death tolls in a century.¹

When my normal routines go out the window, I usually find that my spiritual life gets out of whack, too. If I don’t make time for reflection, I can confuse what’s a cause with what’s an effect, what circumstances have befallen me with which ones I have chosen myself. 

I’ve always imagined that Elijah had a terrible temper. I think when he ordered the execution of the priests of Baal, that was his own idea, not God’s. It was the result of following his own will – not God’s will – that forced him to flee from Jezebel’s soldiers. But as long as he refused to acknowledge his own failures, he wasn’t going to be able to listen to what God had to say.

Jesus has commanded us that whatever we hear in the darkness, we must speak in the light. Sometimes, I’m afraid of the dark… or more accurately, I’m afraid of hearing God’s voice in the dark. I cry out to Jesus, but I don’t listen to Jesus’ loving response. 

I now present an examination of conscience that is unique for the year 2020:

• In this time of uncertainty, do I micromanage family members, co-workers, and friends, … or do I humbly accept my limits?
• In this time of scarcity, do I hoard resources for myself and my household, … or do I care for those who have less than I do?
• In this time of polarization, do I ridicule those who disagree with me, … or do I make the effort to understand their priorities and concerns?
• In this time of protest, do I trivialize the indignities suffered by others, … or do I recognize my own contributions to the injustices in our society?
• In this time of fear, do I complain about individuals acting selfishly, … or do I celebrate the millions heroically sacrificing for the sake of others?
• In this time of isolation, do I find ways to safely connect with my loved ones, or do I choose to spend all my time alone?
• In this time of grief, do I distract myself with unhealthy behaviors, … or do I provide myself with a safe space to allow my heart to grow tender?
• In this time of confusion, do I feed my anger through excessive news watching, … or do I receive updates with efficient discipline?
• In this time of sadness, do I – like Elijah – complain that God has abandoned me, … or do I express gratitude to God?
• In this time of anxiety, do I give in to the clamor of fearmongers, … or do I listen to God’s still, small voice?

What happened when Elijah finally listened to the still, small voice at the top of Mt. Horeb? For some reason, we never that part of the story in the lectionary. God pointed out that Elijah was not alone, instructed him how to stay safe, and commanded him to return to his ministry in the northern kingdom. 

Tonight, as we confess our sins, may we similarly recognize that we are not alone, and that God will protect us. And may such an encounter with God strengthen us for the journey ahead.

Loving God, hear the prayers of those who call on you.
Forgive the sins of those who confess to you,
and in your merciful love, give us pardon and peace.

We ask this through our Lord Jesus Christ, your Son, 
who lives and reigns with you and the Holy Spirit, 
one God, for ever and ever.  Amen.

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