April 11, 2020
Here’s an Easter Reflection based on an experience I had years ago:
Back in the 80’s I met a man named Stephen. He was gay, a recovering alcoholic and had AIDS, which, back then meant certain death. I didn’t know what religion he was if any. At the time I was dealing with my stuff and not dealing with it very well.
Stephen was about 35 and walked with a cane. He’d go to his AA meetings faithfully walking up a flight of stairs. When it came time for him to share, he’d always say “I am so grateful to be sober.” He was always kind and grateful to everyone.
Stephen took a turn for the worse and landed in the hospital. I went to see him.
I will never forget what happened next. I was the priest, so I was the one who takes the lead in visiting the sick, or so I thought.
I stepped into his room and Stephen was sitting up in bed. I said, “Hi Stephen”, “Oh hi Frank”, he replied. “How are you doing, Stephen?” He said, “I’m ok”. And with complete calm and total presence, he looked right through me and said, “and how are you, Frank?” Despite the fact that he was dying and knew he was dying, he was able to become totally present to me, as if I mattered more than anyone in the world. I will never forget for the rest of my life that at that moment I knew I was in the presence of the holy.
Stephen got it. He got the whole point of the resurrection––that his life was not all about him and did not need to be.
I think I want what Stephen had but I’m not sure I want to go through what it takes to get it. I’d rather just be reassured that there is a life after death. That of course is always subject to the next best argument by a brilliant atheist.
The whole point of the resurrection is not to give us a proof subject to debate but to shatter us with the realization that our lives no longer need to be all about ourselves Love surrounds us, holds us, makes us free to love and be loved. Always has and always will.
In this crisis, this pandemic, Stephens are everywhere. Listen to them, and maybe you’ll get it.